I'm copying everyone else because I'm lame and don't want to clean my room or do any of the other things my mom told me to do

I'm copying Camille and Keegan, but mostly Keegan because Camille copied her in the first place.

mwhahahahahhahah. a.

I'm thankful for...

my sister

my mom

the one and only: dad-i-o-da


my baby

the cool people

one of our main ways of communicating:

books, and the people who write them =]

photography


music

harry potter. I'm serious.


Nerdfighters. And nerds in general. They make the world suck less.




John.





Hank.


ficlets and writing


Dance

"up north" and Morro Bay

the Otter Rock Cafe

and all of the memories

happy thanksgiving

=]

A Day to Remember

So like... what Camille said about certain things sparking memories, that's kind of what I meant in the song post I did a couple weeks ago. I didn't get that across very well.

So I don't really have much to say.

Except that, a year ago today I published my first ficlet.

That just shows... how far we've come. I mean, just think about everything that's happened since then.

This past year has been stuffed so much awesome, and so much crazy, and so many things, worth remembering. More than any other year in my life.

And I know Camille and Keegan just did posts kind of about 8th grade. I'm not really... writing because of those. (though I did love both of them)

I'm writing because of Ficlets. I'm writing because I remember November 24, 2007. It was a Saturday. I was getting ready to go to dance. But I had gotten a note from another ficleteer, because I had left them a lot of comments about a week before. They said that they had looked at my page and saw that I hadden't written anything yet.

And so I wrote my first Ficlet. "3 Years Ago" That's the title.

And that kind of seemed like the start. I mean, it wasn't really. But it was around the time when The Island first came into existance.

Can you believe that was only a year ago? Because it seems like a million. It seems like the rest of my life before then, and since then, has been gray in comparison to how bright that year was.

It's kind of ironic, because my first ficlet is about a girl leaning against a tree, looking up at the sky, remembering what had happened at that spot exactly 3 years ago. And I'm sitting here at my desk remembering what happened here one year ago. And everything in between.

I guess I did have a lot to say.

mm

FUCK

did I offend you? I'm sorry.

I'm lying... I'm not sorry at all.

because I'm speaking my fucking mind.

For once.

On Religion... again

You know, I never realized what a small world I was in at PCS. I never realized that what you see is... such a small part of the big picture.

When I first came to PCS in 4th grade, bible class was hard. I had never gone to a religious school before that, and everyone at PCS seemed to know so much more than me.

For example, looking up a verse in the bible. Those of you who came before 7th grade, do you remember the sword drills? Those were so hard for me, seeing as before PCS I had never learned how to look up anything in the Bible.

And all of those Bible stories that everyone just seemed to know. I had gone to Religious Ed when I was little, but that didn't even begin to cover it.

So for the little 4th grade me it seemed like the whole world (or at least the whole Christian world) knew all of this, and I didn't.

But now, at a Catholic school, where a lot of these girls went to Catholic middle schools, the tables have turned.

We were taught how to look up a bible verse. We watched The Prince of Egypt and people didn't know how it ended. I was kind of amazed that people didn't know the Moses story. And now that I think about it, I don't know why I was amazed. What did I think, everyone knew it? How ignorant is that?

I guess because even before PCS I knew the Moses story well. Because of Religious Ed, but also because of Rebecca. Rebecca and I used to pretend we were Jewish slaves trying to escape from Egypt. We played this every day at recess in (my second year of) first grade.

Anyways. I digress. I point is, PCS is a really great school, with really great Bible classes. I owe a lot to those teachers, from 4th grade on. But it's really only one side of a several-sided story. Story isn't the right word... I don't know the right word.

The thing is, now at a Catholic school, at Confirmation classes, at the last couple of retreats I've been to this year, I've started to see the other sides. There is so much I don't know. So much about religion, all of the differences, all of the different beliefs, practices. It's kind of amazing. All of the different things you learn once you leave a strict school like PCS. Please get what I mean by strict. I mean, what they taught was one belief. And they taught it like "this is what is true," whereas the school I'm at now and at confirmation classes, they teach like "this is what some people believe, and this is what other people believe. Now what do you think?"

The first way of being taught is so much easier. They lay it out, so you can understand it. So when you go from that to where I am now, where it seems like all of these different things are being thrown at me from all directions, it's disconcerting. But it's also eye-opening, and really, really, interesting. It's like taking a risk, scary but thrilling. I wouldn't say this is thrilling really, but it is interesting. Seeing different people's point of view.

Thing is, I'm not really sure where I belong. Kelly and I were talking about this last night. (by the way, there is a blog post about that under this one.) I almost just don't want to give myself a title at all, I just want to believe what I believe and not have to stick to a certain group. I'm not saying groups are bad, because they're not. I'm just not really sure where I am at the moment.

So don't challenge me, don't ask me "why aren't you this?" or "why are you that?" because the thing is I don't know either. It's, (I know, I know, this is going to sound cheesy and cliche) it's kind of a journey. Because Taylor Mali is right, "changing your mind is one of the best ways of figuring out whether or not you still have one."

I wrote that on the back of my Religion notebook to remind me to keep my mind open. I want to know as many different people's views as I can in life. Not just on religion, on everything. That's why when I ask people "why?" about their views, I'm not being condescending. I really, genuinely want to know. I want to hear their side of the story, I want to see their point of view. I want to give them the ear to listen to what they have to say without judging, the ear that they want so badly.

Do you get it?

Intellectual Discussion

Kelly and I had Intellectual Discussion last night.

Let me tell you what that means.

We have a "spot" in old town. I've taken you guys there, it's not secret or anything. We just go there whenever we go to old town and stay there for like, hours.

Like last night we stayed up there talking and eating Johnny Rockets and Starbucks for like 2 hours.

Seriously though, it seems so much easier to talk up there. But it seems so much easier to talk to Kelly then anyone else, sooo yah. But we won't be overheard by our parents up there in old town, so it's easier.

We talked about religion, we talked about high school, we talked about theology, we talked about observing, we talked about minds, we talked about mom, we talked about cars, we talked about harry potter, we talked about solitare, we talked about Yoko Ono (well not really, but there was a short documentary thing showing in One Colorado last night and she was talking in it), we talked about hair, we talked about... I don't know. A lot.

It's our favorite thing to do in old town, go up there and pig out and talk.

I really hope she gets over this emo-loving phase thing that she's in. I can get where she's coming from though, I was the same a couple years ago. But she's like, really "popular" or whatever so it's different. And when she's with her friends it's way too hard to talk to her...

ANYWAYS
and then we hung out for like, the rest of the night in my room, and then her room. And then we decided to have a sleepover on the floor in her room. And then after my dance rehearsal today we're going to the mall. And then we're going to watch old Monkees episodes. (because you know, I have the box set) =]

It's a good thing I don't have homework this weekend.

Straightening out some thoughts... came up with this..

There are songs that... bring back, not really a memory or emotion... but a certain feel.
And whether it is bitter or sweet... you find yourself almost missing those old times, that feel, who you were back then

So this is my timeline... those songs, for me.
[some of these may be a little surprising...]

6th

What if His People Prayed- Casting Crowns
Sweet Child of Mine- Guns N' Roses (Sheryl Crow version, really)
I'll Stand by You- The Pretenders
Brass In Pocket- The Pretenders
1921- The Who
Janie's Got a Gun- Aerosmith
Neighdorhood #1 (Tunnels)- Arcade Fire

7th

Used To- Daughtry
Over You- Daughtry
All These Lives- Daughtry
Runaway Love- Ludacris
Sweet Escape- Gwen Stephani
Outside Looking In- Jordan Pruitt
Unfaithful- Rihanna
Welcome to the Black Parade- MCR

Summer before 8th

Basket Case- Green Day
Collide- Howie Day
Waiting on the World to Change- John Mayer
Crawling Towards the Sun- The Hush Sound
Wannabe- The Spice Girls

8th
Magnolia- The Hush Sound
Lighthouse- The Hush Sound
A Martyr For My Love For You- The White Stripes

I Am the Walrus- The Beatles (Across the Universe Version)
Hourglass- The Hush Sound
Slow My Down- Emmy Rossum
For a Pessimist I'm Pretty Optomistic- Paramore
Summer Skin- Death Cab for Cutie
She Had the World- Panic at the Disco
Born for This- Paramore
Antonia- Motion City Soundtrack
Wine Red- The Hush Sound



..
If you have some of your own, you should post them (if you want to) =]


...
I think it's kind of interesting... seeing the past couple of years just shown through the songs you remember most, or rather what make you remember the most, and no other explanation. What do you think?